The US Report: Million-dollar hair

This week's sporting news from the USA, to keep you in the loop when the conversation turns red, white and blue.

Great balls of fire

We've been dwelling on Tiger Woods a little too much in this column in recent weeks, so it's time to take a look at a golfer on the other end of the talent spectrum.

While Tiger's rocky form has put him in danger of losing his No.1 world ranking, this guy is so bad his name has been withheld by the Orange County Fire Authority.

The amateur golfer in question was playing at the Shady Canyon Golf Course in Irvine, California, when, while playing out of the rough, he accidentally swiped at a rock, inadvertently sparking a blaze.

The fire reportedly spread an improbable 12 acres, with 150 firefighters from around Orange County being called to the scene.

Orange County Fire Authority Captain Greg McKeown said the dry conditions in the area were to blame. No charges have been laid against the embarrassed golfer, whose name was withheld from the media.

Million-dollar locks

Pittsburgh Steelers NFL star Troy Polamalu has (presumably) made history by becoming the first footballer to have his hair insured for $US1 million.

Polamalu's trademarkflowing locks have earned him a sponsorship deal with Procter Gamble's shampoobrands in the US, with thecompany this week taking out the unusual insurance policy with Lloyd's in London.

The Steelers defender has been tackled on more than one occasion in the past by players grabbing on to his hair.

Floyd makes a fool of himself

Floyd Mayweather Jr made a bid this week for the title of world's most despised sportsperson, following up his refusal to fight rival pound-for-pound boxing king Manny Pacquiao with a bizarre racist attack on the Philippines superstar.

Mayweather has since apologised for his expletive-laden rant, which was uploaded on the Ustream site, in which he labelled Pacquiao a "yellow midget".

"I do want to apologise for what happened the other night," Mayweather said, two days after the tirade hit the internet. "I want to apologise to everybody because everybody felt it was a racist comment that came from me. I don't have a racist bone in my body, you know."

For the record, here's a slice of Mayweather's trash talk: "As soon as we come off vacation, we're going to cook that little yellow chump. We ain't worried about that. So they ain't gotta worry about me fighting the midget. Once I stomp the midget, I'll make that mother****** make me a sushi roll and cook me some rice."

Bizarrely, Mayweather even took aim at Pacquiao's business sense, saying his rival didn't get value out of his sponsorship deals.

"That mother***** Pacquiao, he can't speak no English. He never seen a contract he didn't like... [He signed] with Nike [and] only got 70 Gs. How stupid can a mother****** be? Reebok gave me a million dollars for three weeks. I wore Reebok s*** for a week for a million dollars."

Home-grown stars struggling

At the time of writing, the USA was coping almost as badly as Australia at the ongoing US Open.

Men's 20th seed Sam Querrey is facing a fourth-round fixture against Switzerland's Stanislas Wawrinka, while women's veteran Venus Williams faces the Italian Francesca Schiavone.

They're the only two Americans left in the singles draws, after Novak Djokovic sent Mardy Fish crashing out on Tuesday.

Spaniards are dominating the men's draw, supplying six players in the final 16, while Russians made up five of the final 16 women's players – although four of those lost their round-of-16 matches, with the fifth yet to play.

For the record, Samantha Stosur is the final remaining Australian in the draw.

Punches fly at the ball game

The brawl of the week goes to Major League Baseball teams the Washington Nationals and Florida Marlins, who came to blows after Nationals batter Chris Volstad threw a punch at Marlins pitcher Chris Volstad.

Morgan, who drew the ire of the Marlins when he crashed into (and injured) Florida catcher Brett Hayes in another game between the teams earlier in the week, had been hit by a stray pitch in the fourth inning and snapped when another wild pitch from Volstad sailed behind his back.

The batter charged at Volstad, throwing a left hook towards his head, before players rushed in from all directions.

Three players – plus Marlins manager Edwin Rodriguez – were ejected from the game, and two more were ejected later in the contest.

While a little battered and bruised, Florida had the last laugh with a 16-10 win.

The best nicknames in baseball?

One thing American sports fans love is a good list, so to that end, the Chicago Now website produced its top 30 best nicknames in recent Major League Baseball history.

No.30's Francisco Rodriguez boasts a moniker not far from a certain former Prime Minister (K-Rod), while other notable inclusions were Mariano Rivera (Super Mariano, No.24), Hideki Matsui (Godzilla, No.15), Shane Victoriano (the Flyin’ Hawaiian, No.8), the 12-fingered Antonio Alfonseca (El Pulpo, "The Octopus", No.2), and Derek Jeter (Captain Clutch and Mr November, No.1).